Today’s forgiving journal: I Don’t Know :)

Today’s forgiving journal is about I Don’t Know.

I don’t know how to even start this blog. 🙂

OK, I can start with what’s present.  I am feeling really vulnerable today.  I am aware that someone hurt me deeply, or at least it feels that way (because truly, I’m the one who’s responsible for getting hurt). How do I forgive this person?

The answer I have inside is, “I don’t know.”  Someone recently reminded me of the power of those three simple words.  Why do I pretend to know how to solve something when I truly have no idea how to go about it?  Maybe it gives me a false sense of safety, or comfort, or for sure – control.  It’s time to let that go and open to the power of unknowing.

My spiritual mentor John-Roger has said something like, if we open to the divine unknowing, we can receive the grace of that.  I’m open to receive grace, and learn more about what this is like for me.

What I’m aware of is that I keep wanting to say, “I know that I really need to forgive myself for judging, because all judgments start inside (rather than blaming the other person).”  And I get strongly that this is not my path right now.  At present, I just need to acknowledge that I blame this person.  Just acknowledge it and ask for help so that I may be set free inside.

I’m going to do my 3-part forgiving process now:

1 – Self-Forgiveness: I forgive myself for judging myself for blaming this person for my hurt.  I forgive myself for judging myself for thinking that my process of forgiving has to look a certain way.  I forgive myself for judging this person as having the power to hurt me.

2 – Letting go: I place all of this judgment….. the whole process of it …. Into the Light and I ask for forgiveness so that I may be clear on what is true for me, and to love it all.

3 – Gratitude: I reaffirm to myself that I am love.  I reaffirm to myself that I have the power to choose love.  I am grateful for learning how to trust myself to do this.  I am grateful to this person for what this experience is teaching and showing me.  Thank you.

******

The peace is truly within me.  I have heard this, and right now, I believe it.  I am relaxed, breathing deeply, and trusting that more peace is to come.

I found this great quote in my email recently on this very thing:

“Finding your peace is like looking for your keys. If you say to yourself, “I know they’re here somewhere,” you’re inviting yourself to find them.”

–John Morton

I Don't Know Rumi May 12 2016The truth … in the stillness of my heart …. Is that peace is seeking me as much as I am seeking it.  A gift of grace starting from just saying, I don’t know.

 

 

I love you! Have a great day.

Love, Debbie


18 thoughts on “Today’s forgiving journal: I Don’t Know :)

  1. I don’t know is a powerful demonstration of being real and honest. What I am learning as well, is to affirm I am open and receiving guidance from intuition which is God’s voice.
    It’s a delicate balance between surrendering and responding to inner prompts. I am getting better at doing this.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Your four steps are part of a great healing process. And it’s okay to not know, just know that you’ll be guided by your actions every day, regardless of how much knowledge you have.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Thank you for this post enjoyed reading it. Oh it is so hard to let go, forgive the hurt. However, if we don’t it is poison for us, it impact us greatly, and even what I have only woke to realise in the last 5 years it creates a negative karmic account and a vicious circle at that too. I wrote two blog you might like – I say might like. It is Just an Insult! Responsibility of Understanding. There are others on my post. I actually want to write more on this topic, because deep hurt is so hard to remove, but I believe I must remove it, and with each act of letting go, I release the burden, the heaviness and I can live. I do believe we can get better at this and we can heal. Meditation is also a very good tool to release, open up and free ourselves. Why poison our minds and hearts. i enjoyed this post, and I am sure i will enjoy the others all the best

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    1. Thank you, Bella, for sharing your thoughts, your experiences and your feelings here. I am so grateful for your presence. What came present for me when reading your post is “Self-compassion” — what a beautiful quality. Good to have you following my blog, welcome!!

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  4. I so hear you. It’s a process, right? I really get that a key for me is just to be honest with myself, and present with what is (best I can). Many blessings, and have a wonderful weekend 🙂

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  5. The steps towards self forgiving are ones that i have discovered here and the way you pointed them out has the sense that commitment towards it would definitely heal ones soul. As far as I don’t know is concerned, the power these words hold is truly high. I can not think of any other words than this at the moment whose effect can be diverse and interpreted in many ways. This entry had great Intel. I pray that you heal faster and have happiness come at you in every way possible. – Cezane

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Sometimes when I pressure myself into finding an answer for something I end up making things worse. “I don’t know” can be such a powerful acknowledgement for me at such moments. And it’s okay to not know. The answer will come in time, usually when you least expect it 🙂

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  7. Not knowing is very hard for me. I like control. 😉 I work very hard to use positive affirmations when I don’t know. Some may even call it a mantra. I just know that it brings me peace while the I don’t knows get figured out. ❤ hugs to you Debbie

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