Happy #ForgivingFridays––can you believe it’s already March (almost)??
I’ve heard from people and my clients how Self-forgiveness seems complicated, or out of reach. In my experience, the opposite is really the case. Self-forgiveness––when you take it step by step––can be simple, and even fun. :). So, for the New Year, I’m trying out a new twist on Forgiving Fridays: forgiveness tips!
I’m posting two for you here. For each one, you’ll see my own personal story, followed by a simple exercise that you can do anytime!
And, in the second tip, you can meet my new cat, Malakai. (He’s incredible…I just adopted him from the animal shelter.)
Here we go…check them out if you want to:
TIP #1: SELF-LOVE
The Friday before last was Valentine’s Day. I woke up without a partner (we split up in Dec) and knowing it could be a hard day for me. I consciously chose to treat myself with a LOT of love. I went out for a run at the beach and then took myself to breakfast. To Urth Caffe, which is one of my favorite spots in Santa Monica, and that is so important (if I’m going to do something really loving, why not make it good right?!!) As I sat there, I felt sad and unsure how to take in my own loving. So, I just accepted that’s where I was. I consciously paused and took a few deep breaths. I put my hand on the part of my body that hurt, and I flooded that part with loving. I didn’t know “how” to do it, I just set an intention that my love walk over there and touch to the place that was looking for it.
The key thing about Self-forgiveness is that it is an act of Self-love, because you are saying, “I choose love, no matter what. Even if it hurts. Even if it’s uncomfortable. Even if I don’t know how to do it.” Because you are worth it, and that loving energy is where the freedom is. So, as a spiritual mentor of mine J-R says, Put your hand on your heart, and say, “This is love.” And give it to yourself today. That is how forgiveness is truly made easy, through the touch of true, unassuming, blessed loving.
TIP #2: SLOW DOWN
I split up with my boyfriend a few months ago, and for the first time we spoke this week. It was heart opening, and vulnerable for me. I really slowed down with myself. I talked to the part in me who wasn’t sure what was going on and had so many questions. I explained what happened, and that part really got it. I deeply listened to my own concerns and gave myself a hug. (And my shoulders visibly relaxed after I did it…always a good sign!)
This is so important to do––because Self-forgiveness is an act of love, and that is worth slowing down for inside of you. So, I invite you, however you do that, to slow down with yourself, with a part that is not sure what’s happening, where you feel upset, or with anything that’s up for you! Try it as an experiment and see how it goes!
To illustrate what “slowing down” can look like, here is my new cat Malakai (I adopted him on my mom’s birthday in Dec. and totally love him. His name means “my angel”.). What is better than a good yawn and purple blanket rest o’ love?!
Let me know how it goes for you if you try out these simple tools to forgive, and if you have any suggestions for future topics I’d love to hear them!
So much love to all of us––it is an honor truly to be in our WordPress community. 🙂
ps: One of the steps in the 21 Days of Forgiveness group I did recently is “Open to Love”. So, as you try out each of the steps above, how about asking yourself, “How can I open to love as I do this?” Be in the exploration, and have fun.
**This post is my contribution to Dutch Goes the Photo’s challenge of the week, Yard. Frank, give Malakai an inch of rest and he’ll take a yard! 🙂 Hope this is an OK interpretation of the theme for this week. By the way, his name means “my angel” in spiritual texts.**