Today’s Forgiving Fridays: Taking a Leap of Faith (Yay!)

Posted on by Forgiving Connects

Happy #ForgivingFridays everyone! Yay! This is an opportunity for you to let go and forgive & post about it ANY DAY this week! See guidelines below. ❤ You can post whatever inspires YOU to forgive and choose love.  Maybe it’s a poem, or a photo or inspiring quote, or you can share a leap of faith like I did.

Today’s Forgiving Fridays is Taking A Leap of Faith.

As you may know, I have a 3-step tool to help me do forgiveness: (1) Self-forgiveness; (2) Letting Go; and (3) Gratitude.

Today, my focus is Self-forgiveness for how I was in my marriage.  I’d like to let go of blaming myself for how it went, and fear around being loved.

My ex-husband is an amazing man. Full of loving, and he gave it to me at a time when I really needed it.  See, I met him in my 20s, I was drinking and doing bulimia.  Funny that this is the first thing I write, because what was really happening had little to do with the alcohol and food.

I was so scared to love.  I didn’t know how to be in relationship and openly give and receive with a partner.  And THAT is what I want to highlight today – the compassion and love that I am bringing to myself for how scared I was (and sometimes still am) to love.

As I write this, I’m smiling, because it is such a perfect time to let this go!  OK, so here we go:

I just found a photo when we were getting married.  I was walking down the aisle in my white dress and holding a bouquet of red roses.  I stopped half-way down, and he was going to meet me there and walk me the rest of the way.  I remember standing there scared that he wouldn’t come.

During our marriage, the fear continued.  It was so hard for me to believe that anyone could love me in any kind of stable way, and I acted in some ways that I’m not proud of.

Funny thing is, I really grew up in that relationship.  I went to a wonderful program called “spiritual psychology” and learned, among other things, how to love myself and forgive myself for my judgments.   I was able to create a safe space inside for the first time to listen to myself.

The greatest thing about judgment is that it can show us the very next thing to love – sometimes years after the fact!  I really love myself, and I didn’t realize exactly how scared I was (and in some ways, still am) to love and be loved by a partner.  Here we go:

I forgive myself for judging myself for blaming myself in my marriage.  I forgive myself for judging that part of me who just wanted a stable home.  I forgive myself for judging myself for feeling so scared to love and be loved.

 

Maybe the Universe brought my ex-husband to me, in part, so that I had an experience of what it’s like to have someone really love me and to learn how to show up in that kind of relationship.  And maybe I brought my ex exactly what he needed to learn and grow. In fact, I know it!

This is one of those blogs where I needed to write the whole thing to get clear – I went back and edited numerous times as I realized what was really going on.  🙂 And I’m so glad I stayed with it because I’m getting free.

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I am SO SO grateful for all of you who contribute to Forgiving Fridays.  I learn so much from you!  Here are this week’s contributions:

Etta of  Simply Etta D. gave us a wonderful post (and very sweet photo) with an invitation to listen to that inner voice of courage … great illustration of forgiveness and standing in love. Bless you, Etta! ❤

DeBorah of Roaming Urban Gypsy shared a gorgeous photo collage illustrating the beauty and wonder of stones and how this helps her to experience solidity and healing – thank you, DeB!

Revived Writer gave us a wonderful rondelet on letting go of old thought patterns and creating space for love.  (A rondelet is a repetitive poem, a format she chose on purpose – so creative!) J

Lady Nimue of Prats Corner was inspired to write a poem on letting go of an old relationship and opening to the healing love of forgiveness.  A first-time contributor – welcome!

Gabrielle of Bone & Silver contributed a reflection on the importance of acknowledgment and forgiveness in moving forward as a culture. What if we truly listened to each other? Gabrielle, many blessings!

Frank of Poetry, Short Prose and Walking  contributed a simple and profound ghazal (a poem with repetitive stanzas) on the beauty of birds’ flight, and more.  He expressed such compassion and encouragement into his simply seeing them, without a camera in hand.

Miriam from Out an’ About wrote a post on living our dreams, and living outside the lines.  She includes so much wisdom, in her words … her quotes … and an amazing song! Thank you, Miriam. 🙂

Kathy of K E Garland gave us an exquisite post on the exquisiteness of self-love and invites us to answer, “How do we love ourselves?” And she’s going to highlight responses.  Check it out (beautiful).

Manuel of emotionsoflife2016 has an amazing blog with poetry, quotes and other unique examples of his self-expression.  He contributed a fantastic quote on simplicity for #ForgivingFridays – welcome!

And in case you missed it from last week: 🙂

Pragalbha of Infinite Living gave us two exquisite posts – the first is reflections on how to be in a healthy relationship & the second is a poem on opening to the grace of her unique self-expression …. with such caring and joy.

Nikki of A Kinder Way wrote a post on a new exercise program that really works for her. She stayed committed when she could have given up — and found a fun & balanced way to love herself. Go Nikki!

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I’d like to end with a magnificent Rumi quote.  As we step into this day, love is meeting each of us half-way.  How cool is that?!

Leap of Faith Rumi quote

I love you.

Love,

Debbie

***This post is my contribution for The Daily Post’s Beloved and Frank’s Challenge, Decay. Frank I found it was time to take a leap of faith and let go of an old fear that was so old it’s decayed! This is so freeing – thank you ever so much!***

 

Here are the guidelines of #ForgivingFridays:  

Forgiving Fridays banner facebook

  • Every day is Friday!  Do a post today or anytime this week.
  • Be creative – there’s LOTS of space for your expression! Write a poem, take a photo, post a quote, share your story …  what opens your heart?
  • Include #ForgivingFridays in your tags
  • Create a pingback link to this post so I can find you. 
  • Have fun – you are awesome!!  

 

 

 

49 thoughts on “Today’s Forgiving Fridays: Taking a Leap of Faith (Yay!)”

  1. Outstanding post Deb. Love is a journey and a pathway. Trust the road with all its twists turns and detours.

    I wrote the following blog post in response to Nurturing Thursdays by Becca Givens and as a response to the Daily Prompt/Post for the word Beloved. Between yesterday and today the Word Compassion has resonated in my heart. As I wrote the Word Compassion began to evolve and take shape as to what it should be and should mean in today’s often cruel society. Who Are Our Beloved? God has Compassion and Mercy for us but when will we have compassion and mercy for the broken hearted and those broken spirits reaching out.

    As a U.S. Army Veteran (1977 to 1981) there is a special place in my heart for Combat Veterans. I am a Peace time Veteran but I served with Vietnam era soldiers and now many of my friends and co-workers went through the horrors of Iraq and Afghanistan. More compassion and less judgment for these brave women and men suffering with PTSD. They answered the call. Returned broken yet found little or no compassion for their broken pieces.

    https://dancingpalmtrees.com/2018/02/01/nurt-thursday-compassion-grace-mercy/

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    1. Wow. DeB, I am so touched by how you share compassion. You are so open to caring and loving others, it moves me beyond measure. ❤ You know, I once did a "compassion wall", where I took a poster board with a little girl on it, and I wrote moments where I experienced compassion all over it. I had that board for YEARS. Many blessings DeBorah, to you and to your brother Stephen. It's a privilege to know you and share this #ForgivingFridays with you. Debbie

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  3. This is beautiful in so many ways! I love seeing pictures from someone’s past. That wedding picture is really nice. Like many wedding pictures, we don’t know what’s behind the smile. I can really relate. Also, the entire sentiment of how relationships can move us toward self love, is quite nicely explained. Love it Debbie!

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    1. Kathy, thank you so much! I really experience the empathy behind your words. It’s like a big reach out and hug to me. And I love how you described what I wrote “how relationships can move us toward self love”. That’s beautifully put, Kathy! I’m grateful to know you, and I love your creative series on self-love. Looking forward to reading more of what moves people into greater loving of themselves! Blessings, Debbie

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    1. Andrea, thank you. I am so touched by your comments. I really paused to take it in. And to stand in your acknowledgment. You are so encouraging and full of light and wisdom. Thank you, thank you for being here! We are each revealing more and more light with our blogs, aren’t we? ❤ Yours is a blessing to me. Love, Debbie

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  8. Yes Debbie, I echo everyone else’s comments here; I am honoured to be mentioned in such a lovely, vulnerable and honest post about Love and Forgiveness. You are truly doing the ‘heart work’, as I call it- digging below the social layers and fears we’ve picked up, to find and express that soft voice of truth which whispers (and sometimes yells!) from our hearts. Blessings on you, Gabrielle xOO

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    1. Thank you so much, Gabrielle!! I read your comment over a few times, because it was so beautiful and compassionate. I am so honored that you contributed for this week’s #ForgivingFridays. I found your post honest and vulnerable and really seeking to do the heart’s work too! Opening to deeper and deeper levels of loving.

      Have a beautiful Sunday and great start to your February, Gabrielle. Feel free to contribute to Forgiving Fridays anytime. Thank you again (and enjoy your greens drinks! 🙂 ) Blessings, Debbie

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  9. Debbie you have such a beautiful heart and your wedding photo is beyond gorgeous! I feel a delight within, at how you open up layers and layers of judgment through honest sharing of your stories. You open space for the readers to look at their own stories with a gentle kindness to themselves.

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    1. Thank you so much for sharing this, Pragalbha. I am moved by your experience of delight. I really did uncover layers and layers of judgment, and brought such tender loving to myself. You see that and I’m so glad it opens a space for you to be gentle with yourself too. ❤

      And I loved your poem for #ForgivingFridays this week. It is so honest, accepting and compassionate — all great foundations for forgiving and loving ourselves from my experience. Many blessings! Love that you are here! Debbie

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  12. You are quite brilliant and inspiring Debbie! I’m back blogging after a period of recuperating post heart attack! I’m so grateful for this Divine nudge to take things easier and I forgive myself for pushing myself too hard. Love your blog,love your warm encompassing energy. You’re a star! Anita😁🙏🙋

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    1. Oh Anita! So glad you recuperated and really listened. Sounds like you got a clear message to slow down, and you are doing it with gratitude. That is such a beautiful perspective. And I’m really touched that my blog moves you ….. my deep intention is for folks to experience a safe and sacred space to pause, forgive and love however that shows up. Welcome back to blogging Anita! So glad you’re here. Thank you for your wonderful comment!! ❤ ❤
      Blessings,
      Debbie

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    1. You are so full of joy, Anne, it spills through each word!! I love that. 🙂 Your comments are like a flower or butterfly sparkling through my blog and scattering joy (to quote another wonderful writer, Emerson). YOU are a blessing Anne. Thanks so much for being here, and for your consistent encouragement. I love you — Debbie

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  15. I admire your courage, I love the quote and you were a beautiful bride. You’re also beautiful inside and out for opening up to us, your experiences help us grow in our forgiveness.

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    1. Oh Etta D, I’m so glad!! It was a vulnerable post for me, and I’m grateful to know that it moved you in your forgiving process. Yay ❤ And you know (or I hope you do!) that I love your contributions for #ForgivingFridays. The posts you write are incredibly uplifting and full of encouragement for each of us to soar. Bless you Etta. I so support you. Debbie

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    1. Ali, you are so welcome. Thank you for seeing my willingness and intention to heal…. I’m sharing my story because I have experienced the self-love and peace that forgiveness brings, and it’s an honor to hold a safe space for others to explore this. And to connect with people like you! So glad you are here, Ali. 🙂 Have a beautiful Sunday and week. Love, Debbie ps – I love your new photo. ❤

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      1. Thanks. I’ve never had a photo on here. I always wanted people to read my words not think about what I look like. I’m trying something new. May your Sunday be blessed with peace and love.

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  24. We can go through painful events because we need to understand something about ourselves that is vital…. some people never learn despite life constantly challenges them… some others do. You have gone through difficult times… and you have learned the most important thing: that you deserve love. And most importantly you are showing others the way to acceptance.
    I wish your wishes will become true 🤗🤗
    (By the way… stunning photo!!!)

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